Looking at life in lockdown

This year has not been easy on any of us. 

I dont think even the greatest minds forsaw  this pandemic. It has changed the world forever. Changed how we see people, changed our perceptions and given us an oppurtunity to redeem ourselves from the things we lost. 

While we did achieve success in bringing some families the time they needed to renew bonds , it has pushed the boundaries of mental health and the need to be able to support healthcare and elderly.

Taking a page out of my own life I found myself constantly  filled with anxiety. I was more aware of the fact that we had two older people  that needed constant reassurance of what was happening around them , to their loss of freedom and meeting with family or friends ,and the sudden death of a relative or friend made them scared and shaky. 

Of the many people I know who have been affected by the  Covid 19, many have already passed on. We do not choose how we die , either the manner or the way we go. We pray we are surrounded by those we love. Corona has robbed us of even that leaving people at the mercy of machine. Often isolated and very alone.

What was it about this pandemic that made us aware of how frail or short a life can be. 

We lost a lot of people along the way, some to covid 19 and many to other non respiratory problems,and because of lockdown proceedures in place we had to suffice with a phone conversation of condolence that means so little in comparison to that warm embrace, that touch of hand , that small moment of intimacy that makes the other person real. 

Just last week my father's younger brother passed away. We could not visit when he was in hospital nor go for the funeral. We got a link on Google meet that gave us a peek into the cemetery service. It saddened me immensely that we had to grieve in isolation.  

A few months ago the friend who's wife passed away early this year called me in the early morning to say he felt uneasy and could I call for an ambulance. 

Our little town has just one ambulance and I  don't think the service is good in that I called a number of times and my call was left unattended.  Realising when he spoke I felt he was having a heart attack I told my husband and son to get ready and go get him to the hospital. They brought him immediately,  he lives around  6 kilometres away from us . 

Anyway we found he had felt uneasy as early as four in the morning but felt it was impolite to call me so early. I am an early bird and am usually up by that time. He had to be taken to the plains as our hospital has just essential care. God's grace he made it through and though surgery is out of question  he is now with family.  

I later found that the ambulance service was not being used for non Covid cases and we had to get the hospital to send one up to take him down. 

His family were so upset that he had not said a word of how he was feeling but we heard that he was missing his wife and living on his own had added to the depression and stress of having to manage himself.  

He called me today and his voice no longer sounded feeble but strong and though he may be bored and not in his comfort zone I pray the time he spend with people he loves and who love him back will be medicine enough.

Life has a way of grouping us together like dissimilar parts, each one distinct from the other yet part of the main and as we struggle to hold together it is this bond  , this sense of family that makes us want to try and make it all work.

It's gotten colder here in the hills and winter is approaching faster than last year or the years before. It seems the year has gone by without much being achieved in terms of work and success.  As farmers we carry on , no pandemic can stop the harvest and though we have had difficulty in labour, we have carried on for hungry people need to eat and work to feed families. Countries   and leaders  did not give these people a chance. 

The season has been good , the rains ample and we look forward to a good season of coffee and pepper.

So as I close on my wondering I hope your life has been less stressful and been days of joy spent with Family . 

I remember reading my son a poem about family when he was a little boy of family being compared to a quilt ,of different colours and shapes. I would like to think my family is a quilt too , and it's the one that keeps me the warmest.

As, the words of the song goes "let's make a toast to the ones that we lost on the way" and hold on to those memories  . Raise your coffee cups high and Salut.